jackjanderson: (A Little Piece Of Heaven)
Never let it be said that I do not look after my girls, or that I cannot cook. I admit I'm not the best cook in the world, much prefer to just cook meat on the bbq but this is Wales and I don't get the opportunity to do that as often as I like.

Samantha & Lucy spent the day out at Penrhyn Castle & Parc with the dogs. (I spent the day watching NCIS and Bones, my backs and knees weren't up for a day on my feet and they could do with some time together, they don't get enough) They came back all cold and wet and exhausted - but happy, which is the important thing. The dogs fast asleep in front the shower, the girls have showered and are flopped down on the couch under warm blankets. Aching feet have been rubbed and dinner has been served. I made sweet and sour pork stir-fry which was a hit all round and Lucy suggested I share the recipe.

I don't have a recipe, per se.
I mixed together pineaple juice, cornflour, tomato sauce, soy, sugar and vinegar. I threw some diced pork into a hot wok, cooked it through then set it aside. Fried the red pepper, chopped pineapple and onion, stirred in the sauce, warmed it through, added the pork back in. Served it with rice noodles. I even did the dishes!

I'm about the join them - and the cats - under the blankets and we're going to watch the 2008 Incredible Hulk. I'm not crazy about this version of Hulk, I definitely prefer Ruffalo as Banner but we're doing an MCU rewatch.
jackjanderson: (The Long & Winding Road)
I'm realising that one of the topics I'm going to end up talking about most is my girls and our relationship/s with each other. I'm also aware that it's going to be misunderstood, misinterpreted so I'm going to come straight out and discuss it.

I have a wife and we have a girlfriend. And believe me, Lucy is very much Samantha's girlfriend as much as she is mine. We are all three in a relationship together.

We are polyamorous.

Polyamory, as defined by the dictionary is the practice or condition of participating simultaneously in more than one serious romantic or sexual relationship with the knowledge and consent of all partners..

What we are not is swingers or cheats. No-one is fucking anyone else behind anyone else's back. We aren't inviting random people into our bed all the time. We are all in a committed relationship, no different to any straight, monogamous couple. It's just that there's three of us.

Polyfidelty is another term for what we have. We're a triad, if you will. A delta.

It's not something that was planned. It's not something either Samantha or I were aware of being or of having any interest in. As my son asked, it's not the reason I got divorced from his mother. It kind of just happened.

Samantha and I have have been in a relationship since 1999, and we have been married since 2004. Lucy and I met in May of 2010. We had sexual bdsm relationship for a couple of months1. She knew I was a married. Samantha watched a number of times and joined in. A few months later, Samantha confessed to me that she was developing feelings for Lucy - and I was incredibly relieved because I felt the same way. We sat down and talked about it, just the two of us and then with Lucy. 6 months later, Lucy moved in with us.

It's not easy. Like any relationship, hell like anything worth having, it takes work. We're still discovering new ways in which we work together. For example, since I retired, Samantha has admitted she's jealous of the amount of time I'm spending with Lucy (Lucy does not work for a number of reasons and so we're both home all the time) so I'm aware we need to spend more time together as a couple. We haven't worked out the finer points yet, still a work in progress. But it's a new situation so we're growing and learning into it and from it




1 the BDSM aspect of our relationship is something I'm planning on writing a post about as well.
jackjanderson: (Crossword)
Thank you everyone for your tips and advice on my last post. I definitely found it helpful, and if anything it just reaffirmed what I already suspected.

Write from the heart, write about what I want to write about, write about whatever is in my head, write about what interests me, write about what makes me happy, write about my life.

So what does that mean? what interests me and makes me happy?

My wife and girlfriend. Polyamory. My son. Books I read, music I listen to, movies/tv I watch. Science fiction. Superheroes (Marvel and DC). Football. Fishing. Gardening. Astronomy. BDSM.

I'm not completely sure how any of these are going to translate into posts but I've also been told to not think so hard about, just 'put pen to paper' and 'dont expect perfection on page 1'

All food for thought and I'm interested to see how it all plays out

I have however been working on the title for this thing. Instead of being a bland Jack's Journal, I've now got a name of Flying To The Stars:Adventures in Space, Time, Polyamory, and Fishing which I really do like. I've also got a layout that I'm much happier with.

One step at a time. Perfect won't happen on page 1.

About Me

I'm Jack, a recent retiree looking for a new hobby. Apparently 'annoying my girlfriend' isn't the best use of my days. Her opinion, not mine

I'm a life-long science-fiction and superheroes fan, and a voracious reader. I enjoy movies, fishing, astronomy, and gardening.

I live in Wales with my wife, our girlfriend and an ever growing collection of four-legged friends.

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